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Muslim Community |OT|

J

Jeels

Member
Salaam Muslim GAF, just saying hello.

So this is messed up but it feels like my social anxiety makes me dread going to mosque. I just want to go and pray, but it's like, the weight of the entire community hits at once every time I go. End up having to talk to people I haven't seen in years and I just feel judged (which makes me go less..which just makes the "wow where have you been??" even worse). Any thoughts or recommendations..
 
Z

Zapages

Member
Jeels said:
Salaam Muslim GAF, just saying hello.

So this is messed up but it feels like my social anxiety makes me dread going to mosque. I just want to go and pray, but it's like, the weight of the entire community hits at once every time I go. End up having to talk to people I haven't seen in years and I just feel judged (which makes me go less..which just makes the "wow where have you been??" even worse). Any thoughts or recommendations..
Click to expand...

Just say you were busy with work/school/etc and schedules couldn't match up for Firday/Jummah Prayers.

I had periods during undergraduate and graduate school when I couldn't attend Friday/Jummah Prayers due to school. So when people saw me after a while. I shared that I was at school.

Just remember in Islam the connection is between you and God and no one has right to judge you. So don't worry about anyone else when you go to Friday/Jummah Prayers.
 
V

victreeb3l

Member
RustyNails said:
Speaking of marriage, mine is falling apart (and I have a 2nd kid on the way). It's been really hard few weeks.
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Sorry to hear man, I hope you guys can pull through. Any kind of counseling you two can attend outside of family?

Jeels said:
Salaam Muslim GAF, just saying hello.

So this is messed up but it feels like my social anxiety makes me dread going to mosque. I just want to go and pray, but it's like, the weight of the entire community hits at once every time I go. End up having to talk to people I haven't seen in years and I just feel judged (which makes me go less..which just makes the "wow where have you been??" even worse). Any thoughts or recommendations..
Click to expand...

Just say you've been busy. Dont let judgmental people get to you.
 
B

Brhoom

Banned
Jeels said:
Salaam Muslim GAF, just saying hello.

So this is messed up but it feels like my social anxiety makes me dread going to mosque. I just want to go and pray, but it's like, the weight of the entire community hits at once every time I go. End up having to talk to people I haven't seen in years and I just feel judged (which makes me go less..which just makes the "wow where have you been??" even worse). Any thoughts or recommendations..
Click to expand...

Look at it from another point of view, they care for you, and that's why they ask where have you been.
 
M

Murkas

Member
Do you guys find that GAF mods "let things slide" when it comes to news stories about subjects related to Muslims? Like you see posts in Muslim threads where if they were posted in a thread about black people, the poster would get immediately banned? The burkini threads are a good example. I'm seeing posts in there and wondering, how they not banned?

Or am I just over thinking things?
 
S

Sch1sm

Member
Murkas said:
Do you guys find that GAF mods "let things slide" when it comes to news stories about subjects related to Muslims? Like you see posts in Muslim threads where if they were posted in a thread about black people, the poster would get immediately banned? The burkini threads are a good example. I'm seeing posts in there and wondering, how they not banned?

Or am I just over thinking things?
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Asian GAF feels the same way a lot of the time when it comes to threads/comments that are racist toward them. Unequal punishment, or recognition of the issue, I guess. Last case I recall for them was this thread about whether or not Asian Americans assimilate and use silverware, or religiously use chopsticks.

I don't really touch threads surrounding Islam anymore, so I can't say. Comments are often ignorant, or tasteless, and people hardly do research before sharing their
incorrect
opinion. Couldn't handle it. It's possible that you're right.
 
G

GetDigitized

Member
Murkas said:
Do you guys find that GAF mods "let things slide" when it comes to news stories about subjects related to Muslims? Like you see posts in Muslim threads where if they were posted in a thread about black people, the poster would get immediately banned? The burkini threads are a good example. I'm seeing posts in there and wondering, how they not banned?

Or am I just over thinking things?
Click to expand...

It's pretty similar on reddit which is also American dominant - but that's not necessarily the issue , all I know is this is just a thing people like to do and real America/the western world isn't like that. It's probably the haters being more vocal, non-Muslims not knowing enough to call them out on it and the small Muslim community on GAF doesn't really visit those threads due to the toxicity as the previous poster said.
 
S

Se7enSword

Banned
GetDigitized said:
It's pretty similar on reddit which is also American dominant - but that's not necessarily the issue , all I know is this is just a thing people like to do and real America/the western world isn't like that. It's probably the haters being more vocal, non-Muslims not knowing enough to call them out on it and the small Muslim community on GAF doesn't really visit those threads due to the toxicity as the previous poster said.
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Well said. I avoid such threads because I'm already aware of the atmosphere prevalent in them.
 
G

GetDigitized

Member
Se7enSword said:
Well said. I avoid such threads because I'm already aware of the atmosphere prevalent in them.
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It's a frustrating situation tbh, we're not helping ourselves by avoiding things, but when the other side doesn't want to listen or use logic there is only so much talking to a brick wall you can handle. Threads like these don't really help sell neogaf as a non-toxic community, so admins should set out some explicit rules at the very least. Although then they'll face the backlash of them censoring either side so i can see why they are turning a blind eye =/.
 
M

Murkas

Member
I get not bothering to step foot in those threads but like GetDigitized mentioned, ignoring it isn't gonna help.

GetDigitized said:
It's a frustrating situation tbh, we're not helping ourselves by avoiding things, but when the other side doesn't want to listen or use logic there is only so much talking to a brick wall you can handle. Threads like these don't really help sell neogaf as a non-toxic community, so admins should set out some explicit rules at the very least. Although then they'll face the backlash of them censoring either side so i can see why they are turning a blind eye =/.
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That's the thing, Blackface/BLM threads have Bishoptl watching it like a hawk so stuff like that gets posters banned quickly. I don't think there's even a single Muslim mod to do the same with all those Muslim threads. And when the Admin of the site posts things like these, what is one supposed to think about the moderation team.

I was thinking of making a thread in OT about all this with links to posts and threads where this is evident and stuff but decided what's the point, I'll probably catch a ban and it won't go anywhere. (Heck, I'll probably get one for linking those 2 posts.)

Hopefully it's more of you guys agreeing with this. If more of MuslimGAF agrees with this then hopefully it can be brought to the mods attention so they can flat out and say they will either work on dealing with it, or don't have a problem with it and MuslimGAF know where they stand.
 
M

Milksheikhs

Member
What kind of pisses me off about these threads is that you have some Non-Muslim people who feel like they are the experts on Muslim experience. Especially annoying when you have a Muslim woman in your thread telling you their experience and you ignore it or twist what they're saying. I think they feel
that speaking for us is liberating when actually a lot of times it does more harm (and is patronizing).
 
Z

Zapages

Member
Eid ul Adha Mubarak Everyone here. :)

@Murkas, I have always felt like that here. :| I don't frequent these topics here as it wastes time and my energy to explain things over and over again. Really sad. :|
 
B

Brhoom

Banned
Eid Mubarak Everyone!

Murkas said:
Do you guys find that GAF mods "let things slide" when it comes to news stories about subjects related to Muslims? Like you see posts in Muslim threads where if they were posted in a thread about black people, the poster would get immediately banned? The burkini threads are a good example. I'm seeing posts in there and wondering, how they not banned?

Or am I just over thinking things?
Click to expand...

No, you're not. I see posts saying that Islam teaches us to explode and kill ourselves and nothing happens to them, insulting the prophet Peace be upon him and nothing happens.
 
H

Hyperactivity

Banned
Eid Mubarak Everyone!

Murkas said:
Do you guys find that GAF mods "let things slide" when it comes to news stories about subjects related to Muslims? Like you see posts in Muslim threads where if they were posted in a thread about black people, the poster would get immediately banned? The burkini threads are a good example. I'm seeing posts in there and wondering, how they not banned?

Or am I just over thinking things?
Click to expand...

I'd probably agree. There are times I see posts from other Muslims that I disagree with, or specific issue is a brought up that I don't see as that much of an issue, but overall, it does feel like this happens.

I don't think it's really a case of the mod team having some sort of issue with us or even sometimes letting that shit slide, it's just that certain types of dog-whistling are much more obvious and mods already are watching those threads like hawks. Sort of the difference between someone talking about immigration in the USA vs Europe; in a thread about the US, it feels like someone talking about the need to secure our borders would get called out and asked to explain much quicker.

Specifically, I wish any response or post that just says "Islam isn't a race" when people call something racist would just DIE, cause dammit you, me, and every other fucking person in the room knows what is meant when they say the word racist, and if the original poster were to appease the shitposter by putting the world bigot and bigoted instead, the same damn message would be conveyed, so at the end of the day, that single line of "Islam isn't a race" was just a stupid attempt at a gotcha post that adds nothing whatsoever
 
B

Brhoom

Banned
I stayed overnight and now it's 7:20 AM here, I have lots of relatives to visit today, I hope I can make it till 5 PM...

If I can make 50KD today (around 150 USD I think) then I'll be fine lol
 
Tizoc

Tizoc

Member
Happy eid y'all
-00hg.png
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K

Kisaya

Member
Eid Mubarak! Feeling a bit out of touch this year since I didn't take the day off and I couldn't find any festivities in my area. It's pretty hard celebrating without family.

I'm thinking of a dish to make tonight that doesn't involve lamb, only because I have no experience making it and me & my boyfriend aren't really big fans of it. If anything I might just take him out.
 
M

Milksheikhs

Member
Kisaya said:
Eid Mubarak! Feeling a bit out of touch this year since I didn't take the day off and I couldn't find any festivities in my area. It's pretty hard celebrating without family.

I'm thinking of a dish to make tonight that doesn't involve lamb, only because I have no experience making it and me & my boyfriend aren't really big fans of it. If anything I might just take him out.
Click to expand...

Eid mubarak! I think we live in the same area. I'm kind of in a similar predicament (in that I'm not so in touch with the community here and I don't have family to celebrate with). If you wanna do anything to celebrate on Wednesday feel free to pm me.
 
K

Kisaya

Member
Milksheikhs said:
Eid mubarak! I think we live in the same area. I'm kind of in a similar predicament (in that I'm not so in touch with the community here and I don't have family to celebrate with). If you wanna do anything to celebrate on Wednesday feel free to pm me.
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Sending you one right now :)
 
Z

Zapages

Member
What do you guys think of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQY516pfjc4

My local mosque, during the khutbah/sermon tell us that we should become closer to the God and not care who gets elected as our relation to God will improve our lives and not voting someone like Trump or Hilary.

I was like yes that is part of it, but pre-destiny vs freedom of choice. We have to be pro-active to make us better and totally disagree with everything is pre-destined....

Something to think about: http://islamicissues.org/id17.html

What do you guys and gals think?
 
R

RustyNails

Member
Zapages said:
What do you guys think of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQY516pfjc4

My local mosque, during the khutbah/sermon tell us that we should become closer to the God and not care who gets elected as our relation to God will improve our lives and not voting someone like Trump or Hilary.

I was like yes that is part of it, but pre-destiny vs freedom of choice. We have to be pro-active to make us better and totally disagree with everything is pre-destined....

Something to think about: http://islamicissues.org/id17.html

What do you guys and gals think?
Click to expand...
Saw the comments to the first video and puked. Sadly lot of people both young and old think like that. There is incredible amount of conspiracy mongering in our community.

As for the video itself, we had an exact same khutbah last friday. It seems like community is super scared about Trump and the leaders are trying to keep things calm. NAK had a good sermon too.
 
H

Hyperactivity

Banned
RustyNails said:
Saw the comments to the first video and puked. Sadly lot of people both young and old think like that. There is incredible amount of conspiracy mongering in our community.

As for the video itself, we had an exact same khutbah last friday. It seems like community is super scared about Trump and the leaders are trying to keep things calm. NAK had a good sermon too.
Click to expand...

I know exactly what that sentiment is like, and frustrates me beyond belief.

The argument that's always worked best in my experience, in at least getting them to slightly change their view, is trying to focus on the common belief in the community (in my experience, and at least within my own family) that they have a duty as Muslims to care for the poor and weak within society, and that if you're in a situation where you barely make ends meet then even if both candidates have the most minor of minor of differences, that difference makes the world for the people Islam tells us to support and help
 
Z

Zapages

Member
RustyNails said:
Saw the comments to the first video and puked. Sadly lot of people both young and old think like that. There is incredible amount of conspiracy mongering in our community.

As for the video itself, we had an exact same khutbah last friday. It seems like community is super scared about Trump and the leaders are trying to keep things calm. NAK had a good sermon too.
Click to expand...

Listening to NAK... I agree on some points of his rationalizing on why some folks voted for Trump, but on other points I respectively disagree about the Muslim voting block note that he brings up. We need to have have a collective Muslim Voting block. If we don't have common voting block then our plights will be ignored as for there not many Muslims in the USA in the first place.

17 minute mark Also about the local discrimination. Has he experienced extreme discrimination and bigotry where it can effect his work? If he has then he would know that policies and the actions that of the president can have perceptional effect on the individuals at a local level.

What's good for the community? I know folks who are truly two faced. They will appear nice and appeasing in front of you and especially the minority. But the second that you are not there they will talk about the most racist things about Muslims. Basically they are bigots. Have you ever tried to get a mosque established in your community? It really brings out all the bigots and racist. The mosque in Somerville area, NJ did not get established because of racism and red tape that brought out by the bigots in the area.

Most Muslim immigrants struggle to survive and they want us to go to be pro-active at the community level. Also when Muslim mosques start events where they have event being paid aka 40 or 50 dollars a person, which can be a lot for folks who are living pay-check to pay-check...

I am sorry, but its not easy to simply say that we should become really pro-active all of a sudden.

Muslims need pro-active and become one voting block. This whole Trump's policies will have not effect on you because of your religion because you get closer to God is complete nonsense. These Trump polices causes Muslims many hardships just like the Bush era and things that I grew up seeing and experiencing. The Muslim community might be more condensed in the cities and will be fine, but outside the city it will become harder for Muslims...

From top of my head:
- Muslim kids in high school and college will feel isolated
- Harder finding jobs due to their religion - and its already hard to get job right now - this is occurring even without the registry
- Racial Abuses
- Muslim parents will not frequent the mosque and their children will fallout of Islam - I have seen this happen and know about few folks who have become like that due to 9/11
- More Difficulty at work

What can Muslims do in my opinion.
- Stop this nonsense of pre-destiny
- Become a more homogeneous voting block
- Stop worrying about what is happening back home - we live here and think about here
- Pro-active by doing more interfaith activities by organize events with local churches and synagogues
- Help the Muslim youth find jobs and mentor them to become better people - the less
- write and visit their local congressman/woman and invite them over to the local mosque for activities
- reduce the entry fee for mosque activities/events for folks who are poor or don't have monetary means
 
G

GetDigitized

Member
Sch1sm said:
Any of you seen this? Facebook, Google, Microsoft, IBM, and Apple Don’t Rule Out Helping Track Muslims
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This isn't an issue [yet], these companies help the government when the government asks them to already, they're simply not commenting on conjecture since the database isn't confirmed to be happening. Trump backpedaled on stuff and the US government hasn't stated their intention of such a thing to happen.In addition, commenting on it has no benefit to the companies, if they say no and then are forced to by the government they'll look weak etc & obviously saying yes would make them look bad.Commenting on it to the media who's whole job is to draw attention is also not a smart move.
 
S

Sch1sm

Member
GetDigitized said:
This isn't an issue [yet], these companies help the government when the government asks them to already, they're simply not commenting on conjecture since the database isn't confirmed to be happening. Trump backpedaled on stuff and the US government hasn't stated their intention of such a thing to happen.In addition, commenting on it has no benefit to the companies, if they say no and then are forced to by the government they'll look weak etc & obviously saying yes would make them look bad.Commenting on it to the media who's whole job is to draw attention is also not a smart move.
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I just find it interesting how easily Apple can say no to the FBI with helping past fingerprint tech when it comes to criminals, for instance, but can't bring themselves to issue a no now. I'd rather they look weak later than back pedal on their "oh, we're all for the people's privacy" act they've been pulling the last year.

Just gives me a feeling that my personal religious values are more of a concern than a person who shoots a place up. That's my rationale.

It's not so much about whether it's necessarily going to be an issue, or plausibility. But, they have to realise that there's millions of people who will feel some type of way about companies as large as these, companies that could easily uproot and move with the revenue they bring in, choose a guy who doesn't know fact from fiction over a majority harmless set of people.
 
G

GetDigitized

Member
Sch1sm said:
I just find it interesting how easily Apple can say no to the FBI with helping past fingerprint tech when it comes to criminals, for instance, but can't bring themselves to issue a no now. I'd rather they look weak later than back pedal on their "oh, we're all for the people's privacy" act they've been pulling the last year.

Just gives me a feeling that my personal religious values are more of a concern than a person who shoots a place up. That's my rationale.

It's not so much about whether it's necessarily going to be an issue, or plausibility. But, they have to realise that there's millions of people who will feel some type of way about companies as large as these, companies that could easily uproot and move with the revenue they bring in, choose a guy who doesn't know fact from fiction over a majority harmless set of people.
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Yeah I was thinking the same thing at first glance, but that and this were two different situations. Them not responding to a media company /news outlet is nothing new, companies don't like talking to them/speculating for various reasons, also they'd need to see where they stand legally before making a statement etc. It's just not worth talking to them, this article is just them trying to drum up hate / attention since they were ignored, seems pretty childish but the media likes to use these kind of cheap tricks (I know I sound like a rambling conspiracy theorist, I promise I'm not).
 
S

Sch1sm

Member
GetDigitized said:
Yeah I was thinking the same thing at first glance, but that and this were two different situations. Them not responding to a media company /news outlet is nothing new, companies don't like talking to them/speculating for various reasons, also they'd need to see where they stand legally before making a statement etc. It's just not worth talking to them, this article is just them trying to drum up hate / attention since they were ignored, seems pretty childish but the media likes to use these kind of cheap tricks (I know I sound like a rambling conspiracy theorist, I promise I'm not).
Click to expand...

Yeah. I get what you're saying. I think what I'm stuck on is how unconstitutional it is, and therefore inherently illegal. So, in my mind, it should be an easy no, with/without legal teams being consulted. If that makes sense?

It's a wait and see, end of the day, but I'm sitting in skeptic corner with it all. :p
 
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